Care Out Loud and Build a Culture of Connection
You love kids. We know this because you are reading this. Plus, this work is too hard to do for any other reason -after all you didn’t go into it for the money! If this is not ringing true for you, we invite you to consider a different profession. For real.
If you are still reading this, we are going to assume you love kids. You know that. We know that. Your colleagues know that. You know who probably doesn’t know that? Your students.
Students do not generally walk into school knowing that every single adult who works there loves and cares about them.
Students do not generally walk into school knowing that every single adult who works there loves and cares about them. Many of them have lots of good reasons not to trust adults. This is especially true if they need frequent reminders, redirection, or have a history of “being in trouble.” They don’t generally walk around thinking, “Wow. Ms. Jones is so dedicated to my success. This must be why she keeps calling home about my missing assignments.” or “Mr. Hughes must really worry about me and miss me when I’m not in class. I’m sure that is why he is giving me such a hard time about my attendance.”
Kids don’t automatically assume that we care about them. The truth is, when kids need a lot of intervention from us, they often think that the opposite is true. They usually think that we don’t like them when we give them frequent reminders and redirection. So what do we do?
We tell them! Out loud. We tell them intentionally, explicitly, and frequently. Telling and showing students that we care for them is deeply impactful. It is also crucial for building a Culture of Connection in our schools. Read on for a few routines that will help.
Care Out Loud Sentence Stems
These sentence frames are both easy and effective. Win-win! Find one that works for you, and use it consistently throughout the day. Here are a few examples:
I'm so glad you are here.
Our class is so much better because you're in it.
You are such a cool kid!
You're awesome!
I care about you.
Take Inventory
The start of the year is the perfect time to gather important information about the students you serve. The method you use will depend on the age of the student, but the idea is to find out some of their favorites (color, song, snack, animal, etc.) and a bit about their life outside of school (who lives in their house, do they have any pets, what sports are they into, and so on). The trick is to gather this information so you can refer back to it easily, and then use the personalized information in a way that lets students know you care. For example, what about a class playlist with everyone’s favorite song? What about giving them a sticker or treat on their birthday? Whatever you choose, you’ll want to personalize their experience and let them know they are seen and cared for.
Celebrate Their Birthdays
We are never too old to appreciate being wished a happy birthday! Before the year starts, make sure each student’s birthday is calendared, either publicly or on the teacher calendar, and establish a birthday tradition. In the classroom, maybe the student gets a small prize and the class sings happy birthday. Maybe the birthday student has some choice in the lesson that day. Maybe you all get a small treat. At the school level, can you share birthdays over the loudspeaker, have a monthly birthday lunch bunch, or send a positive note home to the birthday student's family? If you have a digital reader board, add birthday students to the running announcements. Whatever it is, the key piece is to acknowledge their special day, and let them know we are glad they were born. CTC Tip: For those summer birthdays, it’s fun to celebrate half birthdays so everyone is acknowledged. *It is important to determine if you have any students who don’t celebrate birthdays in their culture and, of course, be respectful of that.
Intentional Greetings and Goodbyes
This can be as simple as greeting each student as they enter by name, and ending each class with a positive exchange. The first and last things we hear stick with us the longest. Use this time to remind students that you care about them. For educators who don’t have a classroom, leverage those drop-off and pick-up times. It is a great time to build relationships with students and their families, so get out there and say hello and goodbye!
Connecting It
Can you imagine a school where students consistently hear genuine messages of care from all of the adults they come in contact with? That is a place they will feel cared for and is a safe place for them to learn. This is a school that has built a Culture of Connection. Get intentional -never assume a student knows that you care about them. Tell them. Often. It will make all the difference.
